Things didn’t go as planned.

Myself and my group of Changed friends felt, with each passing minute, nay second, of the film, anger.  Anger that continued to build and build until my Alice mascara coursed down my face behind black tears of rage.

Vampires.  What the hell do they have to be so sad about?!  Us zombies have it MUCH MUCH worse!  Oh, you SPARKLE in daylight?  Try having your liver slip down your leg while waiting for Starbucks.

Woe is me!  I’m a vampire and I can move super fast and fly and see into the future and look beautiful for ALL OF ETERNITY!

I’m afraid we created a scene.  We weren’t the only Changed in the movie theater and there was kind of a small riot: nothing worse than yelling at the characters and throwing our cokes at the screen, but whateves.

Somebody, probably A LOT of Somebodies, called the military.

Some of us didn’t make it.  Not from my group, thankfully, but still, any Changed that is destroyed hurts us all.

We ran for our lives.  Literally.  And if the one solider that chased us, if his flamethrower hadn’t malfunctioned, we wouldn’t have made it.

That didn’t stop us, though.  As we ran through the streets, we came upon a store, I LOVE VIDEO, that had a big Twilight display and we trashed it.  Broke out the windows and pulled out the cardboard Edward and stomped on him.

As my anger dissipated, I noticed my friend, Sebastian, had stopped his frenzy and was calmly watching us.  He looked at me, cocked a smile, and said, “Here there be monsters.”

I took a step back and looked at us: our riotous frenzy.  If we had been able to get a hold of a real vampire five minutes before…

Here there be monsters.

A shudder went through my soul.

Maybe if the movie had been better… J